The landslide brought me down

My 34th birthday is quickly approaching, and now more than ever I'm aware of the reality of change and the necessity of it as well. Change isn't a thing to dread, as if it will take you down and ruin you, leaving you a confused shell of your former self. If I'm honest with myself, my former self needed changing, no matter the cost. And what is that cost? Pain. My heart aches for people and places that don't even exist anymore, and has held on by the last thin, invisible string just in case the loss is an illusion and I'm only dreaming of the present. It's most incomprehensible to let go of the hands you grasp that are no longer holding on to yours. And to realize that time and distance have not been the only factors in changing the relationship you revere the most, but rather an organic change in that person him/herself that in no way is a reflection of you, but in spite of you and your magical, colorful and bonded past. 33 was a year of amazing and blossoming growth, and its fantastic surprise has made me more hopeful than ever before, b/c I realize the unpredictability of life can work for good, not just a random episode of my bad ole, faithful ole mental illness. I've come to see the fragility of life and its many layers and colors as beautiful and tragic all at once. And waking to a day with another year almost behind me makes me realize that it's worth it- every single tear and giggle has been worth it and I never thought I'd be able to say that even just a few years ago. This song has always conjured up a million epiphanies for me, its words and melody never fail to draw emotion from deep within me. And the questions it asks are so real it's an almost palpable request to take a closer look, have a good cry, linger on the past for a moment and let go. It's about moving on, and I can do that.

Shame on you, China!

During the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, a super-cute little girl brought down the house by singing a beautiful song. So talented, right? Wrong! The precious, fresh-faced, picture-perfect girl who performed did not sing the song at all---- she lip synched. The girl on the right is the one who lent her lovely voice. A Chinese Official said, "The main consideration was the national interest. The child on the screen should be flawless in image, in her internal feelings, and in her expression." Can you imagine the rejection and humiliation that budding singer feels? I'm not pretty enough to represent my country? I sincerely hope that we would not resort to such extreme discrimination and harsh judgement based on a child's particular FACIAL FEATURES. Though I'm not so sure we're above it considering the children featured on TV programs. Another thing China is being called out on is the fact that the majority of professionals in the field of gymnastics believe at least half of China's women's team are underage! By quite a few years, even. Have you seen these girls? Some of them look like little children, and the only proof of age required is a passport issued from their country of origin. Do we believe China is above faking passports? Not if they'll reject and take advantage of an innocent little girl whose voice was perfect, but her face just didn't make the cut.

Bit of trivia: The colors of the Olympic rings are purposeful and not arbitrary. They represent the colors of all countries' flags, b/c every single country in the world has at least one of those colors on their flag.

Karate Kid

Can you believe this guy? Ralph Macchio is 46 and still looks like a frat boy. Just thought you might like a blast from the past. Sorry about the lack of posts, it's terrible, but I'll be back soon!