My admiration of Western Europe began in 1992 when I made a dear friend who is from Spain, and because of that relationship I've been privy to a special kind of insider's view of her world, a world which is in many ways quite similar to our own as Americans, yet different enough to fascinate and surprise me at every turn. A universal phenomenon, very literally, is the fragile and delicate relationship a woman has with herself and her body and her perception of it; one which changes in the blink of an eye, and depends on innumerable factors, not the least of which is "am I attractive?" As Americans, the odds that we are overweight are 2 in 3. But half of American women are trying to lose weight at any given time, and the paradox is in the disparity between the facts of our fatness and the money we spend on diet foods that obviously fail to live up to our expectations. As fat as we are, women, and most dangerously, young girls, are force fed the "must be skinny to be loved" story before they even learn "Little Red Robin Hood." So if we're looking around at one another and we see love handle after love handle, and cellulite at every turn, where are these images of thin=beautiful coming from? Western Europe has always been miles ahead of the game in fashion, and it trickles down to us in images from the media. A little more than a year ago, a huge fashion event was taking place in Spain, and their government made a decision to BAN sickly-skinny models, those with too low a BMI, from taking their turn at the catwalk. People were outraged! I was actually in Spain when the rule was enforced that store mannequins had to be of a healthy size, and the Burger King triple-decker with cheese, so popular in the US, was not allowed to be advertised or promoted, and was eventually taken off the market. The point to this post comes down to the French government's response to all this hype, which is a new bill the French Parliament has already approved unanimously and is set to go up for approval in the French Senate in the weeks to come. This bill would make it illegal to "publicly promote extreme thinness," and "any media outlet encouraging extreme weight loss punishable in court." This would mean that all media, including newspapers, magazines, websites, etc. could and would be liable in court to a judge, and if found guilty of "inciting others to deprive themselves of food" could be imprisoned or fined up to $47,000. This is France! Mother of Couture! The President of the French Federation of Couture, Didier Grumbach, says, "Never will we accept in our profession that a judge decides if a young girl is skinny or not skinny. That doesn't exist in the world and it will certainly not exist in France." Unfortunately this all bubbled up and came to a head more than a year ago when a Brazilian model died of anorexia, and her sister, the girl in the photo, died from it as well. Who can protect women from this shameful disease of self-hatred and bizarrely warped body image issues? The government? My opinion is that, while I admire Spain and now France for making a powerful effort and astoundingly LOUD statement against self harm in an effort to be accepted, it must be us as individuals who promote acceptance of ourselves and each other every single day in every single situation. We HAVE to teach our little girls from the time they're aware of themselves and their bodies that beauty comes from within, e.g. how we treat others, how we treat ourselves, how we take care of ourselves, how we educate ourselves, how we love others and ourselves. And that being and looking different is something to be proud of and enjoy, and the only shame is in mistreatment of ourselves and those around us. The media may be partly to blame, b/c when you open a magazine the people who fill the pages are the exception in this country where body types are concerned. The women on TV and movies are put into fat suits to portray obese characters, instead of obese actresses being hired to play the role. Women in the media simply do not look like the average American woman, and some, esp. the young, fall prey to this misconception and grasp this deception and hold on tight, believing the answers to their pitiful self-esteem are in mirroring these "People" magazine phantoms who do not even really exist. They chase these ghosts, and sadly, often become one. jody
Been looking for the perfect gift idea for that friend with Body Dysmorphic Disorder: "My Beautiful Mommy," by Florida plastic surgeon, Dr. Michael Salzhauer, sets out to explain to children why Mommy is getting a tummy tuck, nose job, and breast implants. Luckily, the children's book will be coming out sometime around Mother's Day, which may be when many Mommies get such presents from Daddies. The tummy tuck and nose job get a deliberate explanation, but not the boob job. The author says, "I tried to skirt that issue in the text itself. The tummy lends itself to an easy explanation to the children: extra skin and can't fit into your clothes. The breasts might be a stretch for a six year old." Mommy tells her little girl, "You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn't fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael is going to help fix that and make me feel better." Hey Mom, BUY NEW CLOTHES! I can only imagine what reaction I would have had as a child....freaking out when my jeans got tight! Please don't send me to evil Dr. Michael who will cut your body to bits just to save money on those costly new clothes. I mean, why else would you not just buy new clothes? (I think I would say!) Mommy doesn't tell her daughter in the book why she's getting her nose done, though she does let her know it won't just look "different, my dear - prettier." Is it me or is this like a freaking "Twilight Zone" episode? "The Stepford....." Mother? After Mommy's mysterious absence and wildly unnecessary surgical procedures, she comes home good as new, just sporting a couple of small, feminine little bandages on her nose and around her waist. Remember, no one told her kid about the breast implants, but maybe she will notice the much larger load Mom's carrying up top now, as is fully present in the illustrations. In the end everyone is happy, because Mommy is "even more" beautiful than before. Somebody slap me and say this is a joke! Sadly, it's true, and it will probably be a popular item on the shelves of Hollywood's little ones!
